| Best Humor | Stupid One Liners A bus station is
where a bus stops. Can atheists get insurance for acts of God? If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP? Does fuzzy logic tickle? If they arrested the Energizer Bunny, would they charge it with battery? I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions. I don't have a solution, but I admire your problem. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"? Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check? I believe the only time the world beats a path to my door is when I'm in the bathroom. Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? What WAS the best thing before sliced bread? Lots of comedians have people they try to mimic. I mimic my shadow. I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one... It wasn't doing what I was doing. I was once walking through the forest alone. A tree fell right in front of me -- and I didn't hear it. I wrote a song, but I can't read music so I don't know what it is. Every once in a while I'll be listening to the radio and I say, "I think I might have written that." I put tape on the mirrors in my house so I don't accidentally walk through into another dimension. |